Wiltbanks Gone Wild

This week has been UC Berkeley's Spring Break!! So while many of Cory's classmates are partying it up in exotic locations and some are even touring Europe, we are still here -- trapped with a child in kindergarten whose Spring Break doesn't come for another 2 weeks and trapped without a trust fund or lottery winnings to really party. But we did allow Alex to play hookie for one day and we did our version of "Wiltbanks Gone Wild." We went into the city of San Fran determined to make the best of the awesome locale we are in right now. So, this was one day of no holds barred, no expense spared, utter economic abandonment. For our current no income status, we might have gone a tad bit overboard. Here's the breakdown:

San Francisco Spending:

BART Tickets -- $21

Trolley Tickets -- $33 (we were going to this adventure the right way -- cable cars were a must. Too bad I didn't realize how uncomfortable a mode of transportation a cable car is. They are crowded and hard to balance on -- especially for one whose abdominal muscles are severely compromised. Thank goodness many people gave up their seat for the pregnant lady.)

ATM fee $2 -- we have GOT to remember that no one accepts anything other than cash in the city

Map of the city and the public transportation that gets you through it -- $3

Italian Lunch for 4 in Little Italy -- $42 (but can you really put a price on having your children discover a love for calamari?)

One Cannoli for dessert -- $4.75 (Cory insisted on this purchase but was nice enough to give us all a tiny bite)

2 Ghirardelli Chocolate Fudge Sundaes -- $17 (this was actually my only reason for wanting to go into the city so we couldn't pass on this. An exorbitant amount to pay for ice cream, but I'd do it again.)

One emergency purchase at Victoria's Secret -- $45 (my old bra actually broke -- this was a must!)

Dinner at a 50's Diner -- $32 (Dad's choice of Tai food was vetoed this time, one exotic meal a day should be enough)

I don't want to even add it up. I think it's enough for our whole family to have gone to Disneyland for the day instead of just across the bay. But we did do some things that were free:

The Trolley Car Museum was free.
Rolling up the kids pants and letting them play on the beach, pretending pirates were coming after them was free.
And the sitting on the sidewalk like vagrants, waiting for the over-crowded trolley to have mercy on us and pick us up was free.

And the kids having a public meltdown on the steps that acted as an ampitheater? Well, that's just priceless.

The Girls' Weekend that Wasn't

The fact that I haven't posted anything for so long can attest to the fact that I am indeed a pseudo single parent with hardly any energy left in the day to heave the ice cream scoop in and out of the carton let alone sit down and write something witty. Thank goodness last week I snuck in a quick girls' weekend to AZ so I had the renewed patience to make it through this stage of life alone, without a present partner. (In my brilliant husband's defense he is doing his part by taking exams that I wouldn't have any concept of faking, preparing presentations that blow my mind, and landing 4 interviews to get an internship this summer. All of which are very important and critical to our family's welfare, but which leave us in 2 entirely different trenches. Mine being the less appreciated one. Wouldn't it be so nice as a mother to hear the words "excellent strategy for household efficiency and way to handle the imminent breakdown of your subservients"?) Cory gets graded on a regular basis and, although I am not anxious to return to a land of deadlines and evaluations, an 'A' would certainly feel good to see in reference to any efforts I have been attempting as of late, albeit not the grade I have probably earned.

Okay, but back to my girls' weekend. With the help of my step-it-up husband, 2 angel friends who endured my kids for a whole day, and a free Southwest ticket, I went to help my mother celebrate her 60th birthday. (Gulp! That seems entirely too big of a number for someone who gave birth to me. That would actually mean I'm in my 30's.) But when I say that I went to help my mom celebrate, what I meant to say is that I helped my mom throw the biggest party of the century. And when I say that I helped my mom throw a party, what I meant to say is that she worked my sisters and me like dogs for 3 days to get the party ready. It was not the relaxing weekend that I had envisioned. I had been looking forward to this time for a month -- anticipating the pedicure I would get, the old friends I would see, and the laziness I could indulge in without my ever present children. Well, I came back to Cali with the same worn and chipped toenails that I left with, the only old friends I saw belonged to my mother (except for my girlfriends who crashed the party), and the only thing I indulged in was the leftover frog-eye salad.

But the party was a success!! And after complaining for 3 days I came away amazed at what my mom can pull off and also at how many people love her. There were over 75 women there! Where I have a hard time finding 3 people to go to lunch with me, she managed to inspire 75+ women to attend a full-fledged luncheon in her honor complete with entertainment and gift bags. She has lived in the same house for 31 years, which is less than 10 miles from where she grew up, so there is a reason for her to have so many people in her life. But she definitely knows how to keep and cherish those friendships and her birthday was evidence of that fact. Although my mom and I might look alike, the resemblance stops there. What with her organizational skills, her inability to sit still, and her dislike of chocolate we couldn't be more different. But if I can accomplish the seemingly impossible task of raising fantastic kids without losing a sense of my individuality like she has, I will be proud of that accomplishment. I love you, Mom!! (But you owe me a real girls weekend. I have 2 words for you -- spa package.)

My sisters and me, up to our ears in frog eye salad (and flowers)

The entertainment. What party is complete without a magician?

That's A LOT of people!

May I Have a Drumroll Please?

IT'S A BOY!!!

(I told you so)

Boy or Girl?

I will admit that, up to this week, I have been in complete denial of my pregnancy. How I have managed to do so while carrying around such a protruding belly (I became a lot bigger a lot quicker with this one) I will never know. But it has been my defense mechanism and I have embraced it. But this is the BIG week, the 20 week mark week, the half-way point week, and more importantly the ULTRASOUND week. Yes, we go in tomorrow to find out what "it" is, and maybe the fact that I will no longer call this thing an "it" as of tomorrow has allowed me to come to terms with the fact that I will be a mother of 3.

Anyone who has asked has gotten my opinion that this baby that I am carrying is in fact a boy. I really, really think that it is and I have back-up from Alex who is dying for a baby brother to ride bikes with (where Alex will always win, so he has informed us.) And I take great stock in the fact that most times little kids are right on when determing the sex of their siblings. So, to back Alex and me up, I did what probably every mother-to-be has done before, but what is really my first go at -- I did all the tests to predict the sex of our baby and we'll see who is right.....

The Heart Rate Test:
According to this one, if the mother's heart rate is over 140 then it's a girl. If it's under, than it must be a boy.
***I sat down and took it and what do you know, it's exactly 140 -- what does that mean?!?

The Chinese Lunar Calendar:
Now this is really a science. You determine the mom's age and the month of conception (which was in September, Charles) and then voi⋅là -- I will be having a girl!!


Belly Shape Test:
I actually subscribed to this belief that you can predict the sex by the shape of the belly. If you are carrying low it is supposedly a boy, and if you are carrying high then it is a girl. The problem with this is that I have no idea how I'm carrying. I'm HUGE (at only 20 weeks) so I think I am carrying both high and low. So we'll call the test undeterminable.


The Ring Test:
You know this one. You put your wedding ring on a string and then hold it over the tummy-in- question and watch the ring swing. If it swings in circles it is a boy and if it swings from side-to-side it is a girl. Again, I found discrepancies with this test, as well. If you hold it over your tummy long enough it will move both ways, in circles and sideways. Another undeterminable assessment, but one that I tried to rig by slowing moving my hand in a circular motion.


And now, the DAD's Weight Test:
If he is gaining weight along with the mom, then it is a boy. If he's not, it's a girl. Well, Cory has actually lost weight (which makes me feel even bigger) so I guess that's another vote for a girl.

And then I took a 21 question quiz. Hight-tech stuff with promising results. I mean, what could be more accurate than asking if my feet arre "colder than before pregnancy" or the "same as before" or if my nose has experienced "spreading during the pregnancy?" And then the computer computes for awhile then spits out a percentage. So according to the "Will Your Baby be a Girl or a Boy" quiz, I have a 57% chance of this being a boy and a 42% chance it's a girl. So, although the odds are on my side, it still leaves me a little disconcerted about the reamining 1%.

Well, with all this high-tech stuff and mother's intuition, who need an ultrasound? But, I'll guess we'll keep the appointment anyway. We'll let you know....

HELP!!

No one should ever leave a pregnant woman alone with a dozen doughnuts. I am having serious issues of self control malfunctioning right now. I asked Cory to get me ONE little doughnut last night and, being the over-achiever that he is, he came home with a whole boxful. I keep hiding them from myself, but I keep finding them. And I just found out that the big long one that Cory had dibs on has cream inside -- YUM!! I just took one little bite and now it's halfway gone. I thought that running to write about my weakness just might make me forget how badly I want to finish the entire box. Not working, just one more bite -- gotta go!

The Surgery

Finally, life has reached some semblance of normalcy. Alex went back to school today -- YIPPEE!! As I alluded to in the last entry Alex had a tonsillectomy last Wednesday. I am afraid I was a tad bit too optimistic about this latest surgery. He's had 8 you know -- not tonsillectomies, just total surgeries -- and my little boy has proved to be a fighter and a fast healer. So when the pre-surgery documents said that "recovery from a tonsillectomy lasts from one week to two weeks, depending on the health and age of your child" I, of course, assumed Alex's recovery would be 2 to 3 days. I even assumed he would be back to school last Friday -- only 2 days after the surgery. Funny, funny, joke on me. And everything was manageable until the official caregiver (Dad) went back to school on Tuesday and Alex was NOT any better. In fact, he seemed worse. I even called and insisted on speaking to the surgeon insisting that this recovery was abnormal and Alex was in too intense of pain. I was talked down to and patronized and after the discussion I'm afraid I am officially considered a "high-strung mother." I wouldn't be surprised if that term is entered into Alex's medical file...."cute kid and all, but watch out for his high-strung mother!" (Oh, and did I mention that I ended up on the gurney next to his in the recovery room with an oxygen mask attached to my face? I'll blame it on my condition and the fact that Alex puked up dried blood 5 times. So in the medical file it will probably state "high-strung mother who is a fainter.) But I believe it is all behind us. When Alex woke up today at 9:45 (not a record for him, but a sign of a good catch-up on lost sleep) he had a twinkle in his eye. I was worried that his tonsils were equivalent to Samson's hair and that without them he would never be happy again. He had been moping around the house and staring off into space for the past week. And when he wasn't moping he was crying out in pain or mad with frustration. But the twinkle is back, he did great at school, and he is back to his old tricks of coming up with every excuse not to go to bed at this very moment. Another milestone in Alex's health saga has been reached. Hey, by the time he reaches adulthood we could have almost every part of his body removed or replaced at this rate.

Singing Praises

So Cory has read many a blog where wives rave about their husbands. You know, "the top 10 reasons why my husband is better than yours." Or the "100 different reasons I love my hunkie hubbie" lists. I know he doesn't expect (or desire) anything so extravagant to come from the thoughts in my head -- there's not much more he can expect when my term of endearment for him is "dude" -- but I think he would be satisfied if I would only start singing his praises and not his blunders every now and then. Well, hold on to your hat, dude....

What my "dh" (that's geek-speak for darling husband) has accomplished in his 5 week break from school:

• packed and unpacked our teeny car 4 times for our many adventures this vacation which required detailed planning and knowledge of physics to accomplish
• put together bunkbeds for the kids -- hello, play area in their room
• cooked dinner more than he ever has in the history of our marriage. And not just any dinner -- a follow the recipe, run to the Chinese market, borrow oyster sauce from Korean neighbor, improvise with different meats found in the freezer dinner. Best chow mein ever!
• Took the kids to the park almost every sunny afternoon
• Picked up Alex from school
• And the biggest thing -- took over as caregiver for our post-surgery Alex. Which included an administration of post-surgery-induced constipation requiring enema of said child at 1:00 in the morning last night.
• Slept with needy and snoring-more-than-ever-even-though-that's-why-he-got-his-tonsils-out-in-the-first-place Alex, so I could get some rest.

And he did this all while writing almost 15 resumes for his summer internship, reading crazy-boring economic books, and obsessively scanning/organizing all of our household paperwork. What a vacation!

Since his second semester resumes on Tuesday, it's going to be an adjustment becoming a single-parent again (we all know how Cory gets when school is in session.) I guess I'll have to say "goodbye" to my running afternoon errands by myself and the daily naps that my body has adjusted quite nicely to. Thanks a ton, Dude!!

*** on a personal note for those who are wondering: I am almost 19 weeks pregnant and no, I don't know if it's a boy or girl yet, but I'll go on record to report that I think it's a boy. Also, one day I might get around to posting pictures of our fabulous Christmas and trip to Disneyland, but don't hold your breath.